Well, I finally emailed my ex to get my old posts back. I stated in the email that he had every right to delete my email and that if it was possible could I get them back. He sent me a really angry email back saying that because I was immature and rude to him. He even corrected the grammar and spelling on my letter.
Here is my reply that I sent: I appreciate the answer.
Here is the reply I wish I sent:
Pip,
I do not know if I would call my actions rude and immature post breakup. I was trying to be diplomatic and professional. Overall, I was waiting for my money and then I was going to cut you out of my life forever.
I'm in a happier place in life, happier then I ever was with you, happier then I have ever been in life, maybe. Almost immediately after breaking up with you, I realized I deserved someone who had dreams and went for his dreams. That I deserved someone who would allow me to follow my dreams as well.
I wish I could sue you. I wish my emotional pain could be proven in court. You used me. You constantly used verbal manipulation to make me do things for you. After the relationship, I thought I owed men sex, that that was the only thing I was good for. You put this idea in my mind. And I hate you for it. I never loved you. Ever.
You got me by buying me gifts and by isolating me. I stayed with you because I was alone. And you put another idea in to my head, that I only had you. I didn't only have you. I have everyone and I don't need you. I never did.
I pray for your future girlfriends and if you ever get married your future wife. You expected me to throw away my family, my friends, my education, and my life to only be with you. You will never change, you will always expect that from a girl. It is a hard thing to do, I almost was able to do it.
I thought maybe one day you would surprise me and be a better friend than a boyfriend or change so I could be with you. You will never surprise me, you will never pay me back. This is typical you. This will never change.
I try to remember the good and not the bad with our relationship. That is hard to do. But I will do it. I will not regret ending it with you.
Your rude and immature ex,
Hannah
P.S. Go to hell. Thanks and good bye.
I like
Haha I liked the one you would have sent. But it's probably better just to avoid confrontation in the long run, you did the right thing.
ReplyDeleteHannah,
ReplyDeleteI didn’t want to reply to you but I can’t let you spread lies about me and expect me not to say anything.
Really angry, huh? Well you told me to go to hell and then a week later you asked for a favor. Obviously I'm not going to send a friendly, happy e-mail. But I didn't swear or make any attacks in the e-mail. I think calling it "really angry" is stretching it. I guess you just take every opportunity to make me sound bad you can get.
Diplomatic and professional? We had finally figured out a payment plan. I responded back with a joke saying the interest was high and then you apparently lost it and told me to go to hell. I really don’t see that as diplomatic and professional.
I'm sorry that you weren't happy with me, I really am. I'm sorry that apparently I don't have dreams... I'm truly sorry for any emotional pain I caused you during our relationship, this was not my intent although I admit I’m not perfect.
I don't think I used "verbal manipulation" to make you do what I wanted. You make me sound like some master manipulator. I'd like to think I'm smart but I'm not that smart Hannah. Obviously you want to do things to make your partner happy, that doesn't mean they are manipulating you.
I find it interesting that apparently I made you feel like you owed men sex. Obviously every guy wants that but as I can remember, you started everything as far as that was concerned. Remember how long it took for me to kiss you? I really didn't want a serious relationship. You were the one who made the relationship serious, and now you made me sound like some pedophile. It's funny how facts can change over the years...
I'm sorry you never loved me. That's a little sad actually. I loved you very much and probably would have died for you given the chance. It didn't work out in the end but I still love and care for you. I’m sorry you don’t feel the same way.
I'm sorry for buying you gifts; I guess that was part of my grand scheme to isolate you... or something. It's funny how you said I isolated you but in the next sentence you say you stayed with me because you were alone. Don't these contradict each other? You said that I made you think all you had was me. As far as I remember, you used to say that all you had was me and you were glad that you had me. Again, it's funny how facts can change over the years...
I asked you to throw away your family? As far I can remember, you didn't want to be with your own family. Remember when you used to say all the time you wouldn't come back for Christmases? I wanted you to throw away your friends? I loved hanging out with your friends and I'm still friends with some of them. Throw away your education? I guess if going to St. Cloud is throwing away your education then yes.
It would be kind of hard to surprise you with being a "better friend" when I never see or talk to you. The only time I saw you told me not to touch you and thought Laura poisoned your drink. It's funny how you go back to the money in the end because clearly of all the things you talked about in the last couple paragraphs the money is the most important.
I will go to hell but I think I have to die before that happens.
Honestly, all I've wanted to be these last months is to be friendly with each other. I thought we were finally OK with each other and then you had to blow it all to pieces... again. I knew we would never be best friends but it would have been nice to at least keep in touch and be friendly. If one day you think you can handle talking to me and being friendly with me, tell me. Sadly, I don't know if that day will ever come. All you want is your money and then you never want to talk to me for the rest of your life. Maybe the reason I didn't give you money is because I didn't want that to happen...
http://www.hannah-daniels.com